Sunday night rituals

Last night as I found myself going through my "Sunday night ritual" I realized, this ritual is what I hate most about Sundays. This is primarily because the Sunday night ritual is all about Monday morning and being prepared for the coming work week - this means the weekend is over and I gotta wait 5 days for the next one. Hence my obvious reason for not enjoying the Sunday night ritual - Monday is upon us all.
These are really stupid little rituals. Things like making sure the kitchen is picked up, on a Saturday night I can look at a sink full of dishes and say, "Oh I'll do those tomorrow morning". I make sure the coffee pot is ready to go with the auto setting on so that the full pot of coffee is awaiting my slow crawl down the stairs the following morning (speaking of, I honestly am amazed that 1. I have not fallen down the stairs getting that first cup of coffee and 2. that I haven't permanently moved the coffee pot upstairs to rid myself of the stairs before caffeine - honestly if I had a full bathroom counter, it would probably be up there, no joke). Around 7:30 I realized that I needed to shower soon if I was going to let my hair dry before going to bed. Night time showers are part of a "winter ritual" that I enjoy because it means that I get to sleep in an extra hour in the mornings and I always feel snuggly and relaxed for bed after an evening shower. Monday-Thursday these showers go as quickly as possible so that I can either make dinner, clean up the mess from dinner or still have some enjoyable evening time left after the shower. On Sunday's it sorta becomes "grooming night". Nothing really hi-tech, but last night as I was pouting about the weekend being over, I just wanted to get my shower over and done with. I looked in the mirror and realized that my eyebrows were outta control - I signed in annoyance because I hate plucking them. I realized though after a relaxing weekend around the apt. in sweats that involved, cleaning, organizing, laundry and general relaxation to the tune of season 1 of West Wing that if I showed up to work saying I did nothing all weekend, looking a hot mess (due to unruly eyebrows), I would find myself embarrassed by this. So I plucked, I took my shower, shaved and put the good cream on my face. This grooming usually is more advanced in terms of a face mask, painting my toes/finger nails, etc. but last night as I plucked I came to the realization of these Sunday night rituals and became so depressed by this fact that I had no desire.
It's funny how as my 25th birthday is quickly approaching (1 month away tomorrow) I find myself more and more obsessed with how I'm going to look for turning 25. Things like weight, my complexion and hair (cut/color) have been so important that I don't enjoy them being so important to me. I was looking through old pictures last night as part of my weekend organization project and I saw pictures from 4 years ago when Jon and I first started dating, my 21st birthday, our first year in DC and I feel that I look old now - I don't enjoy that, I want to look as I did then. I realized around 2 years ago as Jon turned 25 and that meant I soon would as well that I would not going to age well. I know that age is just a number, but when the number has bags under her eyes and awful hair, I have a problem with it. I am consumed with doing all that I can to look amazing by Dec. 18th.......maybe I should do before and after shots, these are either going to make me really happy or really sad.

Living too far from home

I don't know if there is a different word to use for how I feel tonight, but I am pissed! I am just truly frustrated and pissed which has put me very close to depression.
As many of you know, Grannie has an exploratory surgery of her abdomen yesterday, the final thing left to try and understand why she has had like 7 or 8 hospital stays now since May. The surgery took around 5 hours and Dr. Brown explained it to my mom as "quite a mess" once they got in there. Everything overall has been very successful, they ended up taking out 2 feet of intestine that was damaged and had growths which they say were caused by the radiation treatments that she had around 21 years ago. As of an hour ago when Mom left the hospital until this evenings visiting hours, Grannie is stable, has pretty good coloring in her face but she is in a lot of pain which was causing her to cry quite a bit this morning. I am heart broken that I can't be there. I have made a weekend trip home 5 or 6 times now since May just to see her each time she has gotten back out of the hospital. I was just home like 2 weeks ago and I just missed 2 days of work earlier this week because I was sick - I know that I can't miss more work right now when I want to go home for a week at Christmas but this is driving me crazy. I also realize that she is taking quite a few medications and has a morphine drip so a lot of the time she is pretty out of it. I realize all of the logical things but it doesn't stop me in my heart from wanting to be able to jump in my car right now and just drive home.
That's when I start to get pissed that my drive is 7 1/2 hours long. Even by the time I drive home from work, packed the bare minimum and started driving - I wouldn't be home until like 4 a.m. So then I think about leaving tomorrow morning - getting in around 2, and on Sunday start driving back to DC around 1 just to come back to work on Monday. Now after being out sick 2 days this week and all the stress I've been under from the distance of DC I am positive that I would find myself exhausted, miserable and possibly sick again. Planning ahead and going next weekend would be the better option. Leave early on Friday from work, say noon and drive straight home from Rosslyn could be there by 8ish and come back to DC on Sunday......I sit here now at 5:06 pissed that I didn't think about all this last night and do that today. I am even more angry and life has taken me so far away from Jamestown, or that Jamestown has to be so far away from DC - why couldn't I be living in Pittsburgh, I could make the trip tonight with no problem (minus dealing with deer) and not have to leave to come back until like 5 p.m since it would only be a 4 hour trip. yes once again I find myself hating having to live so far from home.
I'm so angry I am brought to tears. I don't know what to do and have no one to talk about it with.........

A good pick-me-up on a Monday afternoon

Now, I'm sure everyone saw this initial site like 3 weeks ago and thought it was funny. But now, now it is something to share!
http://www.palinaspresident.us/never/index.html
We can only pray that it will be NEVER and I'm quite terrified of the fight we'll have on our hands in 4 years, but for now we can laugh at what a jackass she truly is and maybe if we pass this around to enough people, all those who "love" her and start to realize what I know I have seen since August! The questions she was asked were fair, she was just unable to answer them!

I'm not sure that I have much more to say today except to share what is posted above.
My weekend was quite nice - Jon seems to finally be close to a normal US sleep schedule after a week back in the States.
*Highlight of my weekend: Jon made me breakfast in bed and coffee yesterday morning!!! <3 Oh how my heart fills! Yes it's nothing expensive or that fancy, but it was wonderful!
He also gave me his sore throat - I can only hope that he takes better care of me than I did to him! I wasn't the nicest, caring girlfriend last week due to my own lack of sleep, yes I do realize this Jonathan!

Oh it has also been confirmed by my boss that I lose my sense of humor when I'm sick. I don't believe he likes me when I'm not funny because about an hour ago he came to this conclusion that the only time I'm not funny is when I'm sick so I should just go home......interesting.

The holidays come earlier and earlier each year

So we all know how much I love this time of year, especially Christmas time. Obviously with my birthday so close to Christmas (exactly 1 week before), I have always had an excitement and feeling of festiveness when it came to the month of December. Each year you notice Christmas decorations out earlier and earlier each year, most recently as early as mid-October. And everyone always says how crazy it is to see so much Christmas stuff while the Halloween things are still on the shelves - and of course we haven't even starting thinking about Thanksgiving yet but mid-October, but retailers expect us to be buying our Christmas cards and decorations! There used to be a time when you didn't think of Christmas presents, music or decorations until Black Friday - that big day when it was all about the countdown to Christmas. This year, I started getting emails from my favorite retailers about Christmas deals on the day after Halloween, Starbucks already has their Christmas cups fully stocked and I've already found myself forced into buying this years Christmas cards (cause I have a feeling that if I had waited until after Thanksgiving, they would be sold out!) I honestly haven't even come up with what I want to get some of the special people in my life yet, which makes me feel like I will miss all deals or stock in general with the way it's all trending earlier and earlier each year.
I haven't heard a whole lot of Christmas music in public places yet - actually on 101.1 this morning they had some ridiculous song on that was sorta about Christmas and someone in the station asked if they were already playing Christmas music, no one responded. Back in my days at Lucky, we were of course planning for the Holidays by mid-October which things definitely hitting the store before Thanksgiving but the Holiday CD that would come in the mail in early November, was NOT to be placed in the DMX player until Black Friday! Of course we only played about 25% Holiday music in with the standard songs, but still NOT UNTIL BLACK FRIDAY! :-)
I of course, LOVE Christmas music - usually mid summer every year I feel a need to have a little "Christmas in July" week where I will pull up a playlist of Christmas music on my iPod. I would do this at work this year and just be thoroughly happy to be listening to my favorite music, and just wondering what the heck everyone would think if they really knew what music was pumping into my ears! hehe This year, I feel that this need and desire has spread to my friends if I am to go my Facebook statuses (which of course I do, because at least one day a week I spend about of my day Facebook stalking friends). I think it's fantastic of course, cause now I'm not the only one, but it definitely showcases how the Christmas season is spreading and lasting longer each year.
Jon was ready to decorate the townhouse last weekend - which I blame on the time difference after returning from China. He settled for me putting away the Halloween decorations and using listening to Christmas music around the house and renting Christmas with the Kranks on iTunes for our Saturday night movie. Great movie by the way, we need to buy that one this year, cause it's getting pricey to rent each year.
The last thing that I shall ramble on about with Christmas for today is how relief and excited of the first time in 5 years that I do not work in the restaurant or retail business. This means there is no fighting over getting time off to spend with my family. Jon and I discussed dates, I told Conrad and it was a done deal - I guess now I should probably tell the fam, huh? So I get the full week at home for Christmas, starting just 2 days after my 25th birthday (woah!) but for the first time in 4 years, I get to leave DC on Thanksgiving which is HUGE! 3 of these years mom was able to come spend Thanksgiving with me and then the 1 year Nick graciously invited me to spend Thanksgiving with him and his family an Annapolis. I will be traveling with Jon to Ann Arbor, Michigan this year, so I won't get to see my family per say, but spending Thanksgiving with Jon and meeting the Michigan side of the family sounds like a great thing to me!

Of subject, for those of you who knew that Grannie went back to the ER on Monday, probably were not informed of her having to go back on Monday night and be admitted once again. Mom and I are hoping that she is going home to 249 today, but I probably won't know more about it until early this evening. I pray that something could be done to stop her from having to go through this process each time, I pray that she doesn't end up there again because the drs. have said they will take her straight to surgery next time. This may sound like the better plan to some of you, but past surgeries are what's causing this so technically it could happen all over again and secondly, surgery on some who is almost 85 is scary in it's own right, no matter how strong she may be. Mom said last night that she looked the best that she's looked in a long time, which I was happy to hear. I am positive that her getting home soon with make us all happy!

Barack Obama Elected President

What a historic night! Barack Obama is the projected President. I don't know if there is a way to express how amazing it has been since last night to be in DC for this historic election.
Starting yesterday around 4:30, I realized how excited I was for today, I realized that I felt like I was 8 years old again and that it was Christmas Eve. There has been an electricity in the air all day today and I've sat here since 7 p.m. watching as each set of polls closed and CNN discussed at 1% where both stood, at 0% a projected win and we all sat here and watched Obama's numbers climb. Working in Virgina, living so close to Virgina I was looking forward to seeing this swing for the first time in 44 years, and it happened at 11 p.m. as they called this election for Barack Obama. We all raised our glasses (or beer bottles) to cheer to Obama and it was stated "we will never forget this moment" and I can guarantee that I will never forget this!

I talk of the vibe you felt in DC these last 2 days, so we open my door and you can hear the people from blocks away screaming and cheering. Naturally we all start screaming and start creating our own upset of shouting, screaming and cheering and it was incredible. A once in a lifetime opportunity to be here with friends and experience something so amazing.

I now sit here at 11:19, listening to McCain's speak. Of course I am BEYOND excited to know that I'm seeing his, Cindy McCain, Sarah and Todd Palin's face is over. I get angry right now as McCain speaks gracefully about calling Obama to congratulate him and the republicans stand there and BOO! Democrats would never do something so disgraceful. I look forward to never hearing the words "my friends" and "maverick" from John McCain or Sarah Palin's lips.

I sit here now waiting for Obama's speech. We all know how amazing his speeches have been in the past - I can't wait. There seems to be a theatrical pause as we all wait to here from Obama, I will have to post more on my feelings on the speech later, or tomorrow morning :-)

The campaign is over, the mud slinging between the 2 parties is over, there will be do upset and recounting like the last 2 elections have brought us. It's a happy ending for all of us who knew where the true CHANGE would come from. I think of Obama's grandmother, looking down upon him tonight and I am saddened that she did not live to see this amazing, historic moment. She was surely so proud of him. And of course, I think of our beloved Fernando that we lost today. Fernando would talk of how great seeing this happen would be and Fernando I hope that you know that you were with us tonight and I wish that you had been here to watch this part of our history, I have no doubt you have looked down upon us tonight, Budweisers in hand :-) I will miss your smiling face in the lobby each night.

Night ya'll - RIP Fernando <3>

Happy Friday

It's not so much a Happy Friday, just because of the fact that it's a Friday, but I have very happy that I spoke with Grannie this morning. Mom had her call from her room once she got to the hospital today. For those of you who didn't know, Grannie went back into the hospital this week and once again had to have her stomach pumped. We've all day to take things one day at a time as far as testing and whether or not surgery will have to be done. Obviously they do not want to have to do surgery due to her age, so if you have a minute - say a quick prayer that surgery is not needed and that this can be cured another way. I gotta say that this has been even harder this time around and not just because I'm sitting all the way down here in DC, 400 miles away from Grannie and the rest of my family but because after how AMAZING she was on Saturday and Sunday, I just can't believe we're back here again. I mean the last time this happened she had just been so sick she could barely leave here house - last Saturday she actually went to JCC for ASHF and was making plans to get out of PT early enough on Thursday to make it to Bemus to see her friends - how could anyone imagine that when she started getting sick on Sunday night and begged my mom to stay at her house and this is where we we end up once more? Definitely no one in my family. I am just happy to have spoke with her this morning. They have stopped pumping her stomach which means they took the tube out and it was much easier for her to talk. From here, we're taking it one day at a time - I do think that when she gets my card and scarf this weekend, it will cheer her up!It's funny how I can finally be at a point where I'll admit to enjoying living in DC, love the life I am creating for myself right now and like my job and then something like this happens and BAM! I hate everything about DC and all I want is to be closer to home. This becomes even more important when my parents get this thing going where they don't like to "share" bad news with me. Knowing this from pets dying in the past, when I don't hear any updates for 5-12 hours, I start to panic. Last night was so bad that aside from the full body sweat that I was experiencing, I was scared Jon was going to have to take me to a hospital here to medicate me to calm down. I was sure visiting hours were over at 9, so while watching the new Grey's, I was giving her until 9:30 to get home and call me. Then as the episode was ending, I thought maybe she's taking her shower first and then calling. I barely remember how last nights episode ended or the preview for next week because I was no longer breathing normally and kept asking Jon why it was so hot in the apartment. I had a fan on but was just dying and here sat Jon happy as a clam fresh out of the shower - what the hell was wrong with me. So at 10, I took a deep breath and dialed mom's cell # preparing myself for the worst.....no answer. I left a voice mail and tried again. At this point I decided to busy myself with dishes, picking up the kitchen and preparing all necessary things like my coffee pot for the morning. By 10:17, I was back to calling mom's cell, calling the home # and leaving one of those messages on the answer machine "HELLO?? anyone there???" I finally decided to call my dad just to find out that he was on his way home from work and heard nothing from anyone either and was wondering why - this prompted me to completely lose it, especially when he said "well if I get home and she's not there, I'll go down to the hospital and see what's going on". I got off the phone crying and Jon asked if everyone was ok and my response was "I don't know" I cried for a bit while Jon kept trying to call my mom's cell phone. Jon then informs me that my moms' phone is going directly to voicemail - I try one more time to see if this is true, but it rings like usual and she actually picks up. At this point it's a little after 10:30. Remember when I said that visiting hours were over at 9? Well yea she was just finally leaving because Grannie had had well, quite an interesting evening. Her IV had fallen out around 7 and they were unable to get it back in, which meant a specialist had to be called and brought it (she has been unable to eat due to them pumping her stomach for 3 days, so the IV was pretty important!) I talked with mom for about 30 minutes about everything that had been going on and we must have said "ok talk to you in the morning" 4 different times while I tried to get her home and to bed at a reasonable hour and somehow our conversation would continue. Don't worry, Dad was informed of my contact with mom before he left for the hospital so he could have his dinner and get to bed as well.Jon was very patient in listening to all these stories again once I got off the phone. I had calmed down considerably but there was no way I was going to bed - I stayed up and watched TV until around 2 before going to bed - this also meant that I totally over slept this morning - sigh thank God it's the weekend!

Getting through it all day to day

So here we are on another Tuesday. I just had this realization of how each morning when I am getting ready for work, I come up with all these "things" that I should do when I get home from work. Always around this time each day (after eating my lunch), I become ridiculously sleepy and find myself sitting here thinking that I can not wait for 5 or 5:30 so I can go home and relax on my couch! Of course this is amazing for a couple of hours, but the next thing I know, Jon is home, dinner has been made and consumed and around 11 p.m. each night I find myself pissed off that I have not done ANYTHING once more. Does anyone else ever feel like they need a week off from work to just stay home, rest up and get things done? Ever feel like there is so much that needs to get done at work, that you're exhausted without actually doing anything? I hope you all are better than I, and yet I hope that someone you understand where I am coming from and that I am not just a complete unmotivated jack ass wasting my life! *sigh* oh well, someday I will be back on track - hopefully it will be soon!

Can I just say how much I love the townhouse? Cause I do! We have lived at the Promenade for over 3 1/2 years now and I can't even remember what it was like living in 614 anymore (never mind that we were there for over 2 years), let alone 419! Scary, I saw some pictures I posted online of that move into 614 and when I saw the scary pictures of 419, I wanted to cry! How on earth did Jonathan and I live there as long as we did and not kill each other? How do you come out of something like that and still love the other person that you've been living on top of! This is why TH7 is so wonderful. Not only the new furniture and the set up or the beautiful granite counter tops in my kitchen, but to sit on my couch and look around and it feels like a home! It's fantastic! I feel relaxed in my own home, which I don't believe either of us had before. I find myself desperately wanting to do more around my home to make it even better - even little things like cooking/baking. Speaking of, good Lord did I bake a lot over the weekend! Friday night was Chili night for the debate (after getting some tips from Alton!). Saturday I made Zucchini Oat bread as a healthy snack alternative as well as breakfast for me at work during the week. I also made some jell-o with fruit and marshmallows cause I love it and finally had enough room in our tiny fridge to get a large bowl in there for a couple of hours. Sunday is definitely when things got crazy. Grocery shopping brought it all kinds of fun new foods and by Sunday evening we now had Lentil soup courtesy of Jonathan and I concocted garlic dip, homemade salsa, baked apples, Swedish almond cookies and fall spice cookies. I was verging on exhausted by 7 p.m. when Haley came over, but it was amazing to have all this wonderful food and leftovers in my kitchen and fridge! It's a good enough feeling to make you want the next weekend to be here to do it all again, but for now, I am satisfied with going home and night, having dinner with Jon and enjoying some sort of crafting experience. This would include the amazing new yarn that I started crocheting with last night that I sit here now and think about how badly I would like to be home finishing that scarf so I can go buy more of that yarn and soon!!

Well, I supposed my "lunch break" is technically over, and I definitely have plenty to do to keep myself busy for the next 4 hours............besides, how much more rambling of mine do you really want to read? No Jon, no yams for lunch :-)