So clearly I have not been "getting in the swing of things" as I had hoped 2 weeks ago when I last blogged. I have realized that I don't think about getting on here during the day like I used to. Somehow I think about it around 2 a.m. when I randomly wake up and my mind starts racing about ridiculous things, which of course keep me up longer than anyone wants to be awake at 2:30 a.m. when they have to get up for work in the morning.
Perfect example would be last night/this morning, when my mind decided I should wake up and run through the entire musical score to Lucky in the Rain.....seriously?!? I did the show like 9 years ago and probably have not listened to the soundtrack in at least the past 2 months, but never the less, I sang just about all of it last night/this morning, remembering all the crazy times that came with that show, the wonderful memories that I have followed with me over the past 9 years and of course the amazing life long friends that were made.
These early ass morning sing-a-long sessions that I seem to be forced into with my mind are the #1 one thing keeping me from starting to run and train again. Thanks to my good friend Mary and her blogging about running a half marathon next month, I have been keeping up on her training which has inspired me over the last 2 weeks to want to get back into running in the mornings. Before I had started working again, Jon and I were fairly consistent in running about every other morning and I was running further that I EVER had before. Granted, I can only run a little over a mile, maybe a mile and a half before I DIE in Kalorama park and can't even look up or talk to someone for about 20 minutes. I was still becoming very proud of myself for getting better and loosing some weight and feeling generally better about myself.......then I started working and getting up at 6:20 in the morning. I have a really hard time wanting to get up at 6 to go running and know that it will be 12 hours until I'm even home again, let alone the 17 or so hours until I'm in my bed again - definitely not motivating! I do find myself every day at work listening to music to fill my day and motivate me through my work, and I have started making lists of songs w/ the proper BPM to run to (thanks to Mary's earlier blogs). I have a list of like 12 songs right now (which at say an average of only 3 minutes per song is 36 minutes, CLEARLY a lot longer than I will need to run 1 mile), yet I haven't even taken the time at night to create this playlist in iTunes and update my iPod!
I complain about body image and wanting to do something about it a lot, yet I don't actually take the time to do it. I want to feel comfortable in my skin next week in FL, yet I know that it's impossible in less than one weeks time to get myself to that place. Hopefully I will find the strength, motivation and determination to get up early and run this week and eat healthier and just maybe I'll be a little bit closer to reaching that goal by Sunday. No one wants to feel uncomfortable in their own skins and clothes while running around Disney (which I'm sure will be a great work out as well, yet eating out every day will not!)
Hopefully I will remember to get on here tomorrow and I will be able to discuss my first run back at it again!